Slanted
Ocean eyes, tell me more
please don't dare cloud over,
keep me casted and ignored
hardly ever sober.
medicated mid-day crisis
I'm coming down again,
and my dear the honest truth is
my high has got to end.
Face reality
whatever that may be,
with such informality
regarding all that we see.
Taken for granted
nothing holds meaning,
and now the ground is slanted
and the sun is bright, beaming.
Now tumbling over
and falling down,
in this world of clover
that I've somehow found.
Confusing, constricting,
never level-headed,
this new found reality
is forever being shredded,
changing, evolving,
something stable? No not here,
no problem worth resolving,
strictly out of fear.
My poems/writings reflect my feelings and anything that inspires me to write the piece. Sharing them on a widescale is a dream of mine, so this is the first step. Enjoy!
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Not Again, Written, 12/25/2010
Not Again
My response lingers short-lived.
A shell of something
That was once
Thought out so well.
Rehearsed,
Now half of that,
Not even.
Cut off.
In words.
Inside.
A hole that expanding, collapsing
Me in upon myself.
That is the feeling,
The empty,
And undefined,
That feeling.
That goes.
Without.
Words.
My response lingers short-lived.
A shell of something
That was once
Thought out so well.
Rehearsed,
Now half of that,
Not even.
Cut off.
In words.
Inside.
A hole that expanding, collapsing
Me in upon myself.
That is the feeling,
The empty,
And undefined,
That feeling.
That goes.
Without.
Words.
First Sight, Written, 12/25/2010
First Sight
Not sure that I believe
in love at first sight,
but there is something.
More than lust,
less than love,
I'd explain it as a sense.
Knowing something
secure has been bound,
whether recognized right away,
or kept dormant
for a dreary day.
A thread's been spun
between us both,
maybe small, and breakable,
but by none other than ourselves.
What we make of our thread
is up to us.
Spend time, to make a stronger stitch
or let it fray, and eventually
fall away.
Most precious is the presented possibility,
and having found it under circumstances
such as these.
In a world such as today's,
to completely connect with one another
for even a fraction of a moment
means so much more than what we
take from it.
So now,
through some perfect pattern of events,
I have come to find you
now thriving in my life.
Merry Christmas
Not sure that I believe
in love at first sight,
but there is something.
More than lust,
less than love,
I'd explain it as a sense.
Knowing something
secure has been bound,
whether recognized right away,
or kept dormant
for a dreary day.
A thread's been spun
between us both,
maybe small, and breakable,
but by none other than ourselves.
What we make of our thread
is up to us.
Spend time, to make a stronger stitch
or let it fray, and eventually
fall away.
Most precious is the presented possibility,
and having found it under circumstances
such as these.
In a world such as today's,
to completely connect with one another
for even a fraction of a moment
means so much more than what we
take from it.
So now,
through some perfect pattern of events,
I have come to find you
now thriving in my life.
Merry Christmas
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Learned, Written, 12/8/2010
What I fear the most
is forgetting,
losing a single moment,
slipped from my mind and
forever lost.
Something so minuscule
it may be without a trigger,
nothing to take me back
to bask within it.
Maybe forgetting such small simplicities,
no matter how lovely they are
is necessary, to make space,
just in case
something sincerely unforgettable
needs some safe keeping.
We forget what necessarily may
not be needed, despite it's true beauty
that goes unnoticed.
We will lose these small parts of ourselves
the infinite small moments of beauty,
until we truly find them as
something of importance.
is forgetting,
losing a single moment,
slipped from my mind and
forever lost.
Something so minuscule
it may be without a trigger,
nothing to take me back
to bask within it.
Maybe forgetting such small simplicities,
no matter how lovely they are
is necessary, to make space,
just in case
something sincerely unforgettable
needs some safe keeping.
We forget what necessarily may
not be needed, despite it's true beauty
that goes unnoticed.
We will lose these small parts of ourselves
the infinite small moments of beauty,
until we truly find them as
something of importance.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Sand Castle, Written, 12/7/2010
I'm throwing out words like life lines,
hoping something sticks,
and that maybe someone might be brave enough
to come and reel me in.
A burden on your back, but I really need you now,
someone to collect my life,
because right now I don't know how.
Hold me tight, and up right, like a castle made of sand,
admire me for what little time there is,
until the next wave does what it can.
hoping something sticks,
and that maybe someone might be brave enough
to come and reel me in.
A burden on your back, but I really need you now,
someone to collect my life,
because right now I don't know how.
Hold me tight, and up right, like a castle made of sand,
admire me for what little time there is,
until the next wave does what it can.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Dabbling, Written, 11/30/2010
Yeah, so I've dabbled,
dabbled pretty deep,
until blood drew,
and not just one line
there were quite a few...
Deep and distracting
catching every one's eye,
there were no excuses,
something hard to deny.
The thrill of it all,
makes me lose a piece
of myself,
like it's been taken away,
sat at the very top
of a shelf.
Out of reach,
gone for good,
it's a complicated thing
many have not understood.
The pain keeps me
further away from the edge,
because see, without it,
I lean closer
towards that ledge.
Inspired by the book Impulse written by Ellen Hopkins
dabbled pretty deep,
until blood drew,
and not just one line
there were quite a few...
Deep and distracting
catching every one's eye,
there were no excuses,
something hard to deny.
The thrill of it all,
makes me lose a piece
of myself,
like it's been taken away,
sat at the very top
of a shelf.
Out of reach,
gone for good,
it's a complicated thing
many have not understood.
The pain keeps me
further away from the edge,
because see, without it,
I lean closer
towards that ledge.
Inspired by the book Impulse written by Ellen Hopkins
Sunday Afternoon, Written, 11/28/2010
Spend the entire day indoors,
Around the whole house I explore,
Closely examine each cabinet door,
Slide across the waxed granite floor,
Spare change in the couch I hunt for more,
Slide down the banister until my bum is sore...
While reading please play http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HP8znu3xc-M
My inspiration.
Around the whole house I explore,
Closely examine each cabinet door,
Slide across the waxed granite floor,
Spare change in the couch I hunt for more,
Slide down the banister until my bum is sore...
While reading please play http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HP8znu3xc-M
My inspiration.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
In My Attic, Written 11/28/2010
Trophies,
rarely treasured forever.
Often stashed away,
left collecting dirty dust.
Never to be discarded,
we'd miss the memory too much.
Neglected, but kept, as a reminder,
not quite on our to-do list.
But always close by to bring back
when we need that small
self assessment.
To know we were once in the right,
had it all together and under control.
My trophies,
are my people.
Kept collectively in a jar,
stashed safely away in my attic
for some serious safe keeping.
All for me and none for you.
They know no better,
reciting what I needed to hear
on the day I decided to keep them.
Neglected and rarely retrieved,
but some time soon,
I know I'll need them.
rarely treasured forever.
Often stashed away,
left collecting dirty dust.
Never to be discarded,
we'd miss the memory too much.
Neglected, but kept, as a reminder,
not quite on our to-do list.
But always close by to bring back
when we need that small
self assessment.
To know we were once in the right,
had it all together and under control.
My trophies,
are my people.
Kept collectively in a jar,
stashed safely away in my attic
for some serious safe keeping.
All for me and none for you.
They know no better,
reciting what I needed to hear
on the day I decided to keep them.
Neglected and rarely retrieved,
but some time soon,
I know I'll need them.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
That Girl, Written 11/27/2010
My week, warped around when we'll meet again.
You resurrect a piece of me put away far too long.
I am the giddy heart imploded school girl
every discontent commonsense woman obtains,
somewhere inside.
I am the princess, swept away and off her feet
during every Disney movie.
Charmed as a snake I lay and wait.
To be her,
that girl again.
You resurrect a piece of me put away far too long.
I am the giddy heart imploded school girl
every discontent commonsense woman obtains,
somewhere inside.
I am the princess, swept away and off her feet
during every Disney movie.
Charmed as a snake I lay and wait.
To be her,
that girl again.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Make-Over, Written, 11/23/2010
I believe we should search for faceless friends,
wouldn't we then be in a better place?
Not always competing with judgements
as if we're in a long-haul race.
Find what you search for through conversation,
and something we share in the like.
The way we currently view relationships
is somewhat of and upward hike.
Hard to make it work,
and fit in the way we should.
Things were not meant to be this way,
and I'd surely fix it if I could.
I've found fault within myself
being consumed by what's covered above.
Imagine with such a make-over,
how we would define true love.
wouldn't we then be in a better place?
Not always competing with judgements
as if we're in a long-haul race.
Find what you search for through conversation,
and something we share in the like.
The way we currently view relationships
is somewhat of and upward hike.
Hard to make it work,
and fit in the way we should.
Things were not meant to be this way,
and I'd surely fix it if I could.
I've found fault within myself
being consumed by what's covered above.
Imagine with such a make-over,
how we would define true love.
Part 1 Airplane, Written 11/23/2010
A damaged girl, sporting sweaty palms.
Coffee fueled and ready for flight. A twisted contortionist for optimal fitting,
perhaps in the overhead compartment, she's no bigger than any carry-on.
She'll pass on the peanuts, pretzels, and postcards. Feathered trail of bread crumbs be gone.
Taking the path never-traveled, making it up along the way. Seeking the sort that no one will, and the friends others fear to know.
A conqueror of the unexplored, learning what we all have right to know,
but rarely ever search for.
Coffee fueled and ready for flight. A twisted contortionist for optimal fitting,
perhaps in the overhead compartment, she's no bigger than any carry-on.
She'll pass on the peanuts, pretzels, and postcards. Feathered trail of bread crumbs be gone.
Taking the path never-traveled, making it up along the way. Seeking the sort that no one will, and the friends others fear to know.
A conqueror of the unexplored, learning what we all have right to know,
but rarely ever search for.
Exceptions, Written 11/22/2010
I only make exceptions for a few,
and of course I'm meaning only you.
Defend you against every friend,
Suppose I'm a fighter until the end.
I've talked you up pretty tall,
shame you make me feel so small.
Sure I'll pretend to brush you off,
but yeah you know deep down I'm soft.
A complete push-over from head to toe.
But from my own mistakes I'll grow,
out of you maybe, we'll have to see.
Time will just have to tell me.
and of course I'm meaning only you.
Defend you against every friend,
Suppose I'm a fighter until the end.
I've talked you up pretty tall,
shame you make me feel so small.
Sure I'll pretend to brush you off,
but yeah you know deep down I'm soft.
A complete push-over from head to toe.
But from my own mistakes I'll grow,
out of you maybe, we'll have to see.
Time will just have to tell me.
Saturday, November 13, 2010
A Sensible Man, Written 11/13/2010
A Sensible Man
My uncle Brad is a sensible man,
But one afternoon
He took my hand
And told me he'd seen that other land,
What lies beyond,
A little past the break of dawn,
the question without answers to be found
He claims to have seen himself
Lying upon the ground,
An experience out of body
If you will,
He claims not to understand it still,
All he can offer is a memory,
A small prologue to what we all
Will see.
My uncle Brad is a sensible man,
But one afternoon
He took my hand
And told me he'd seen that other land,
What lies beyond,
A little past the break of dawn,
the question without answers to be found
He claims to have seen himself
Lying upon the ground,
An experience out of body
If you will,
He claims not to understand it still,
All he can offer is a memory,
A small prologue to what we all
Will see.
Out on a Limb, Written 11/13/2010
Out on a Limb
How much more intriguing would I be,
If I lived high up within a tree?
Refusing to come down
Among the limbs I'd dance around,
Imagining myself to be Robin Hood
From the very branch on which I stood,
From my quiver to bow and feathered hat
Speaking in ye ol woodsman tone at that,
A Robin Hood without his merry men
All alone I am left my tree to defend.
How much more intriguing would I be,
If I lived high up within a tree?
Refusing to come down
Among the limbs I'd dance around,
Imagining myself to be Robin Hood
From the very branch on which I stood,
From my quiver to bow and feathered hat
Speaking in ye ol woodsman tone at that,
A Robin Hood without his merry men
All alone I am left my tree to defend.
Voice, Written 11/13/2010
Voice
I know I have a voice
It's hiding somewhere in my head,
It seems as though I've misplaced it
Perhaps stuffed beneath the bed,
But certainly not by me,
well...
Maybe.
I know I have a voice
I'm quite certain it is not dead,
Perhaps it has just escaped me
Playing hide and seek instead,
Lurking somewhere I cannot see,
Perhaps my voice is running free.
I know I have a voice
It use to lay in me like lead,
All the things I would have liked to say
But rarely ever said,
Perhaps it's found someone other than me,
Through which it may speak more easily.
I know I have a voice
It's hiding somewhere in my head,
It seems as though I've misplaced it
Perhaps stuffed beneath the bed,
But certainly not by me,
well...
Maybe.
I know I have a voice
I'm quite certain it is not dead,
Perhaps it has just escaped me
Playing hide and seek instead,
Lurking somewhere I cannot see,
Perhaps my voice is running free.
I know I have a voice
It use to lay in me like lead,
All the things I would have liked to say
But rarely ever said,
Perhaps it's found someone other than me,
Through which it may speak more easily.
Friday, November 12, 2010
Threads, Written 11/12/2010
Dressed to impress
Out on the town tonight,
I've redone my lipstick three times
Something I have got to get just right,
My favorite topcoat hanging at the ready
Waiting patiently upon it's hook,
This is but no ordinary jacket
It has quite a peculiar look.
Lined inside with silk for such a sensual fit,
Sleeves lined down to my wrist
The tail ending at mid-hip,
Seven buttons to the top
Each a penny's size,
And might I add how this color
Accentuates my eyes.
The picturesque pattern alone,
Deserves a paragraph all it's own,
Oddly arranged oriental birds,
Peacocks of some sort
I imagine they travel in herds,
Betwixt the feathers leafed flowers boldly show,
In wild pinks, blues, and purples
All down my back they grow.
Finally, to tease with it's touch,
Anyone to hug me
Now enjoys it doubly as much,
the fabric soothes the skin,
A lovely deep lavender suede
Greets all who gather me in.
Out on the town tonight,
I've redone my lipstick three times
Something I have got to get just right,
My favorite topcoat hanging at the ready
Waiting patiently upon it's hook,
This is but no ordinary jacket
It has quite a peculiar look.
Lined inside with silk for such a sensual fit,
Sleeves lined down to my wrist
The tail ending at mid-hip,
Seven buttons to the top
Each a penny's size,
And might I add how this color
Accentuates my eyes.
The picturesque pattern alone,
Deserves a paragraph all it's own,
Oddly arranged oriental birds,
Peacocks of some sort
I imagine they travel in herds,
Betwixt the feathers leafed flowers boldly show,
In wild pinks, blues, and purples
All down my back they grow.
Finally, to tease with it's touch,
Anyone to hug me
Now enjoys it doubly as much,
the fabric soothes the skin,
A lovely deep lavender suede
Greets all who gather me in.
Charade, Written 11/12/2010
Charade
Oh how my beauty's let me down
Mistaken and misshapen me
Thrown her colors all around
Dazzling and distracting
Disguising true intentions
With shiny toys and fairy tales
Clouding all perceptions.
A facade, short-lived
It could not last
Seeing through this charade
From yesterday back through the past
Unraveling and reeling
There's not much to be known
She's pulling at your heart strings
Digging down to bone.
It bothers you
The door she's unlocked inside your head
Letting something escape
That's now hiding beneath the bed
Always there on the edge of your dreams
Breathing the idea of
Nothing being what it seems.
Oh how my beauty's let me down
Mistaken and misshapen me
Thrown her colors all around
Dazzling and distracting
Disguising true intentions
With shiny toys and fairy tales
Clouding all perceptions.
A facade, short-lived
It could not last
Seeing through this charade
From yesterday back through the past
Unraveling and reeling
There's not much to be known
She's pulling at your heart strings
Digging down to bone.
It bothers you
The door she's unlocked inside your head
Letting something escape
That's now hiding beneath the bed
Always there on the edge of your dreams
Breathing the idea of
Nothing being what it seems.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Unmarked, Written 11/4/2010
You wouldn't like me at night,
scratched and scarred
searching for something I can't quite
put my finger on.
Curious and creative
searching for suggestion
to further my poetical persona.
An odd informality,
keeping the past close by
reminiscing ancient reality
to poke at an inspiration
eagerly easing into a rhythm,
to sweep and sway the super conscious
particularly those paying close attention.
I entice you to find my footing
feel my motion and movement
swelling slightly and significant,
that of most importance
will go knowingly unnoticed
feel what may not
be real.
Inspired by not the lyrics but the sound of the music.
The song The Bird and the Worm, by The Used.
scratched and scarred
searching for something I can't quite
put my finger on.
Curious and creative
searching for suggestion
to further my poetical persona.
An odd informality,
keeping the past close by
reminiscing ancient reality
to poke at an inspiration
eagerly easing into a rhythm,
to sweep and sway the super conscious
particularly those paying close attention.
I entice you to find my footing
feel my motion and movement
swelling slightly and significant,
that of most importance
will go knowingly unnoticed
feel what may not
be real.
Inspired by not the lyrics but the sound of the music.
The song The Bird and the Worm, by The Used.
Irreplaceable, Written 11/4/2010
I see a thousand faces
to me they're all the same,
searching for a substitute
someone to take your place,
someone to fill the gap
warm me the way you would
I'm lost without a map
I'd retrieve you if I could.
Swallow you up
and hold you in,
living happily together
in a house made of tin,
listening to the rain
falling lovely on our roof,
happiness is out there
you are my living proof.
Please don't push me away
and make me keep searching
for a face,
the closest thing to something
I can not replace.
Momentarily sated
I know it wont last,
I feel I will forever live in
the shadow that you cast.
to me they're all the same,
searching for a substitute
someone to take your place,
someone to fill the gap
warm me the way you would
I'm lost without a map
I'd retrieve you if I could.
Swallow you up
and hold you in,
living happily together
in a house made of tin,
listening to the rain
falling lovely on our roof,
happiness is out there
you are my living proof.
Please don't push me away
and make me keep searching
for a face,
the closest thing to something
I can not replace.
Momentarily sated
I know it wont last,
I feel I will forever live in
the shadow that you cast.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Forgetting Me, Written 31/10/2010
Dragging me deeper
Downward
So much on the line,
I have got to let go of you
This time.
As far apart as we've ever been
I can't let you in
again.
Having me all ripped apart
not just speaking
of my half-hung heart.
An erased friendship
more than lost love
now a lost cause..
What have I done now
what have I become
Look how we've unraveled
What have I done
something so unforgivable
Oh dear
It's not me.
I'm not always like this
A terrible mistake
I've been set up I see
A small stitch in your
bigger picture
something planned
known all along
to forget me
as you will this song.
Downward
So much on the line,
I have got to let go of you
This time.
As far apart as we've ever been
I can't let you in
again.
Having me all ripped apart
not just speaking
of my half-hung heart.
An erased friendship
more than lost love
now a lost cause..
What have I done now
what have I become
Look how we've unraveled
What have I done
something so unforgivable
Oh dear
It's not me.
I'm not always like this
A terrible mistake
I've been set up I see
A small stitch in your
bigger picture
something planned
known all along
to forget me
as you will this song.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Make-shift Monster, written 10/11/2010
I am a red-hot wire
Laying out intentionally.
Catching whomever I can.
Just being the nuisance you made me out to be,
If the shoe fits
Why not slip it on?
Out to get you
Out to burn you
Slip under the skin to itch.
Tick tick away
Tedious thoughts
Eat away at your heart.
Continuously accusing me of this
Has led to some sort of self-fulfilling destiny
Molding me,
Into a make-shift monster.
Laying out intentionally.
Catching whomever I can.
Just being the nuisance you made me out to be,
If the shoe fits
Why not slip it on?
Out to get you
Out to burn you
Slip under the skin to itch.
Tick tick away
Tedious thoughts
Eat away at your heart.
Continuously accusing me of this
Has led to some sort of self-fulfilling destiny
Molding me,
Into a make-shift monster.
Friday, October 1, 2010
Without Me, Written September 29, 2010
Without me
You are not winning this
I wont let it build up inside of me
until I'm ready to burst
With anger
With sadness
I am releasing you
Sweating you out
Exerting the energy
You will not get what you want
And that is a rise.
A rise out of me.
No, you will not get what you're after.
Well..
Perhaps you will, since you want to be without me.
Regardless of whether you take back what you said or not,
Without me,
You will be.
You are not winning this
I wont let it build up inside of me
until I'm ready to burst
With anger
With sadness
I am releasing you
Sweating you out
Exerting the energy
You will not get what you want
And that is a rise.
A rise out of me.
No, you will not get what you're after.
Well..
Perhaps you will, since you want to be without me.
Regardless of whether you take back what you said or not,
Without me,
You will be.
Oh how I, Oh how we, You and Me. Written 10/2/2010
Oh how I, Oh how we, You and Me
Oh how I'd love to lift,
Lift right off my tippy toes,
Soaring upward
Skyward bound.
Oh how I'd like to float,
Float freely on a bed of balloons,
Ever climbing
Climbing higher.
Oh how I'd like to see,
See the earth as only birds do,
Migrating south
Moving forward.
Oh you know I'd wave to you!
Waving like only the best of friends do,
Craving company
Come with me.
Oh how we'd waltz,
Dance daringly across the stars,
Suspended in space
Beautiful milky way.
Oh how wonderful it would be,
To have you here,
Yes,
You with me.
The picture that was sent to me for inspiration
Oh how I'd love to lift,
Lift right off my tippy toes,
Soaring upward
Skyward bound.
Oh how I'd like to float,
Float freely on a bed of balloons,
Ever climbing
Climbing higher.
Oh how I'd like to see,
See the earth as only birds do,
Migrating south
Moving forward.
Oh you know I'd wave to you!
Waving like only the best of friends do,
Craving company
Come with me.
Oh how we'd waltz,
Dance daringly across the stars,
Suspended in space
Beautiful milky way.
Oh how wonderful it would be,
To have you here,
Yes,
You with me.
The picture that was sent to me for inspiration
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
It's Mine, Written August 14, 2010
It's Mine
A future to hold in the palm of my hand,
In my palm alone.
Unfortunately for me
This is something I've never known.
Never quite free,
To stumble into uncertainty.
A life I control,
Manipulated by me.
Not a genie to others
Being what they want me to be.
Wishes all around,
But none are my own.
This life for me has never been mine alone.
They are wanting what is best,
And it's what I should want
I guess.
But this aching
Itching
In my chest
Constantly reminds me
My heart will not rest.
The hardest
Most difficult
Is around the bend.
And even though I love them
My life is not theirs
To end.
A future to hold in the palm of my hand,
In my palm alone.
Unfortunately for me
This is something I've never known.
Never quite free,
To stumble into uncertainty.
A life I control,
Manipulated by me.
Not a genie to others
Being what they want me to be.
Wishes all around,
But none are my own.
This life for me has never been mine alone.
They are wanting what is best,
And it's what I should want
I guess.
But this aching
Itching
In my chest
Constantly reminds me
My heart will not rest.
The hardest
Most difficult
Is around the bend.
And even though I love them
My life is not theirs
To end.
The Sea as She, Written August 2, 2010
The Sea as She
The sea will breathe me in,
And she will breathe me out.
Over the past four years
I've had my share of doubt.
She is uncertain,
As is the sea.
When one wonders what lies beneath.
Treading water in her waves
Bur no further than your toes
May you gaze.
What mystery would there be
If she allowed the clarity to see.
the bottoms of her depths
Each wave inhaled as a breath.
I would dive into her sea
Knowing I am unable to breathe.
Trust the depths to crush me,
Until I no longer be.
Now a part of her.
Sinking in the sea.
The sea will breathe me in,
And she will breathe me out.
Over the past four years
I've had my share of doubt.
She is uncertain,
As is the sea.
When one wonders what lies beneath.
Treading water in her waves
Bur no further than your toes
May you gaze.
What mystery would there be
If she allowed the clarity to see.
the bottoms of her depths
Each wave inhaled as a breath.
I would dive into her sea
Knowing I am unable to breathe.
Trust the depths to crush me,
Until I no longer be.
Now a part of her.
Sinking in the sea.
Where He Walks, Written August 2, 2010
Where He Walks
A relaxed and serene ocean view,
Luminescent moon on water
And a path of glass for me to walk.
To think of me,
Almost as majestic as he
Who walks on water.
However uncomparable we may be,
I understand why he walks the sea.
A moonlit path of glass.
A relaxed and serene ocean view,
Luminescent moon on water
And a path of glass for me to walk.
To think of me,
Almost as majestic as he
Who walks on water.
However uncomparable we may be,
I understand why he walks the sea.
A moonlit path of glass.
It's Price, Written May 18, 2010
It's Price
The delicacy of beauty,
Confronts me when I least expect
However, I stay true to my duty,
Always learning to accept.
The ugliness that looms,
Draping over our eyes,
Pouring down in monsoons
From the disheveled gray skies.
The beauty itself so easily caved,
As if knowing what was to come
meant it couldn't be saved.
This inevitable fate
Has cost all hope for this place,
Waltzing around in a zombie like state
Every person I pass is without a face.
No judgement or envy without eyes to see
If this were the case,
All beauty'd be free.
The delicacy of beauty,
Confronts me when I least expect
However, I stay true to my duty,
Always learning to accept.
The ugliness that looms,
Draping over our eyes,
Pouring down in monsoons
From the disheveled gray skies.
The beauty itself so easily caved,
As if knowing what was to come
meant it couldn't be saved.
This inevitable fate
Has cost all hope for this place,
Waltzing around in a zombie like state
Every person I pass is without a face.
No judgement or envy without eyes to see
If this were the case,
All beauty'd be free.
You Aren't Listening, Written April 26, 2010
You Aren't Listening
Hidden as always,
Keep yourself closed off,
At a safe viewing distance,
Barricaded in
Blocked off from all else;
Or just me.
The one you don't want to see
The one you can't see
Or choose not to.
Whichever.
What if,
You take me for what I am
And take what I am trying to show you,
Trying to give you.
Refuse me.
Like you have, and will.
Even if i was within reach
Would you accept me..
Catch me as I'm falling..
You wouldn't before.
You think you know what I need.
What it takes to get me by.
So keep on taking it away from me
Claim that you've nothing more to offer.
You may take things for what they are
As I act foolishly
In the only way I know how.
But I will continue to wear my heart on my sleeve
For all to see,
Especially you.
I wear it for you.
I cannot make you feel
As you have shown me countless times.
You're impossible to reach,
Perched upon your mature feelings.
Your need to handle this with control.
I am reckless
I am immature
And I will flounder on the ground
Until you open up and feel.
Lose yourself in what we have.
I will not pester you
Drown you in my wishes,
What I wish could be,
What I know could be.
If I could travel through time,
Travel through space,
I hope you know where I'd be.
I know you do.
Watch me destroy everyone else for you.
I know I will.
Regardless of my intentions.
Hidden as always,
Keep yourself closed off,
At a safe viewing distance,
Barricaded in
Blocked off from all else;
Or just me.
The one you don't want to see
The one you can't see
Or choose not to.
Whichever.
What if,
You take me for what I am
And take what I am trying to show you,
Trying to give you.
Refuse me.
Like you have, and will.
Even if i was within reach
Would you accept me..
Catch me as I'm falling..
You wouldn't before.
You think you know what I need.
What it takes to get me by.
So keep on taking it away from me
Claim that you've nothing more to offer.
You may take things for what they are
As I act foolishly
In the only way I know how.
But I will continue to wear my heart on my sleeve
For all to see,
Especially you.
I wear it for you.
I cannot make you feel
As you have shown me countless times.
You're impossible to reach,
Perched upon your mature feelings.
Your need to handle this with control.
I am reckless
I am immature
And I will flounder on the ground
Until you open up and feel.
Lose yourself in what we have.
I will not pester you
Drown you in my wishes,
What I wish could be,
What I know could be.
If I could travel through time,
Travel through space,
I hope you know where I'd be.
I know you do.
Watch me destroy everyone else for you.
I know I will.
Regardless of my intentions.
My Mask, Written April 12, 2010
My Mask
The sound,
It triggers my release.
An escape to only where I know myself.
A stranger to all else.
A mansion housing only me,
Overlooking an aggressive sea,
But there is only me.
Feeling depth,
In each dying breath.
Keeping still,
Savoring the last of my tranquil,
Time that has elapsed in space.
the world is gaining,
At an alarming pace.
Soon to be swallowed,
In a world we all know,
A life emptied and hollowed,
Where little will grow.
To keep me here is all I ask.
To blind a hideous world,
With my mask.
The sound,
It triggers my release.
An escape to only where I know myself.
A stranger to all else.
A mansion housing only me,
Overlooking an aggressive sea,
But there is only me.
Feeling depth,
In each dying breath.
Keeping still,
Savoring the last of my tranquil,
Time that has elapsed in space.
the world is gaining,
At an alarming pace.
Soon to be swallowed,
In a world we all know,
A life emptied and hollowed,
Where little will grow.
To keep me here is all I ask.
To blind a hideous world,
With my mask.
Without You, Written March 14, 2010
Without You
Mangled in my own confusion,
Never seeming to sort things out.
Only a repressed regret
Featherless and cast out.
Kept forever at a distance,
The time only trudges by.
Locking my limbs in a frozen state
I've not even the strength to cry.
Powerless and beaten down,
Beneath a blush toned sky.
I refuse to give you up
Even my heart you will deny.
Mangled in my own confusion,
Never seeming to sort things out.
Only a repressed regret
Featherless and cast out.
Kept forever at a distance,
The time only trudges by.
Locking my limbs in a frozen state
I've not even the strength to cry.
Powerless and beaten down,
Beneath a blush toned sky.
I refuse to give you up
Even my heart you will deny.
Sinking, Written March 10, 2010
Sinking
Washing me out
From day to day.
Hands blindly reaching up,
Hoping to find your face.
The current strengthens
Threatening control.
You've brought this chaos,
For what reason I'll never know.
Flooding my life,
Changing all that you touch.
But I'll never cast you out
It would hurt all too much.
These troubled waters,
Drowning this life at hand,
Descending the crushing depths,
To settle in the sand.
Washing me out
From day to day.
Hands blindly reaching up,
Hoping to find your face.
The current strengthens
Threatening control.
You've brought this chaos,
For what reason I'll never know.
Flooding my life,
Changing all that you touch.
But I'll never cast you out
It would hurt all too much.
These troubled waters,
Drowning this life at hand,
Descending the crushing depths,
To settle in the sand.
Stain, Written March 8, 2010
Stain
The blood red stain,
Of my lips.
Still caresses your face,
Trails along your collar,
Marking my claim.
You'll wear my heart
Along your sleeve,
My scent in your hair.
An impression,
Burned into memory,
There is nothing I have left
Untouched.
I have stained your heart,
Traced your outline,
Marked your life,
And I'll go nowhere.
Never to leave your side
In this failing world.
You are what I hold dear.
The blood red stain,
Of my lips.
Still caresses your face,
Trails along your collar,
Marking my claim.
You'll wear my heart
Along your sleeve,
My scent in your hair.
An impression,
Burned into memory,
There is nothing I have left
Untouched.
I have stained your heart,
Traced your outline,
Marked your life,
And I'll go nowhere.
Never to leave your side
In this failing world.
You are what I hold dear.
A Fork, Written November 13, 2009
A Fork
Center myself,
Trying to find some sort of order,
Some clarity in this murky,
Somewhat scary situation,
Finding myself here,
Does not surprise me,
It is within my nature,
As I have clearly displayed throughout the past,
And once again,
I find myself unsure,
Uncertainty plagues me,
Plays tricks and teases,
Turned around and lost,
A new fork in my ever-winding road appears,
The ordinary and the undefined,
Tensed to sprint headlong,
But in which direction?
I'm tearing at the seem,
I never knew I owned,
Hearts will splinter,
And some will pound,
the new found path keeps my attention,
And I am so tempted.
Center myself,
Trying to find some sort of order,
Some clarity in this murky,
Somewhat scary situation,
Finding myself here,
Does not surprise me,
It is within my nature,
As I have clearly displayed throughout the past,
And once again,
I find myself unsure,
Uncertainty plagues me,
Plays tricks and teases,
Turned around and lost,
A new fork in my ever-winding road appears,
The ordinary and the undefined,
Tensed to sprint headlong,
But in which direction?
I'm tearing at the seem,
I never knew I owned,
Hearts will splinter,
And some will pound,
the new found path keeps my attention,
And I am so tempted.
My Imagination, Written November 13, 2009
My Imagination
My thoughts wrap securely around you,
Your presence triggers a persistent sense of stability in myself,
Centered and still,
You've created a concrete base,
A safe house of my own,
Saving me from everything,
But most importantly myself,
Throughout the day,
In clouded far away thoughts,
I am with you,
In my own sense of time,
In my own place,
A place that exists only to me,
Only I know it's expression,
To describe it,
Is to disloyal it,
However, you are there,
The only thing any outsider will ever lay eyes upon.
I admit this begrudgingly,
For I wish you were all my own,
As is this place,
Tucked safely away in the folds of my imagination,
Also,
Hindering my self conscious,
Is the sheer fact that this is imagined and only imagined,
I am without you and retreating from my world,
Becomes more difficult with each passing hour.
My thoughts wrap securely around you,
Your presence triggers a persistent sense of stability in myself,
Centered and still,
You've created a concrete base,
A safe house of my own,
Saving me from everything,
But most importantly myself,
Throughout the day,
In clouded far away thoughts,
I am with you,
In my own sense of time,
In my own place,
A place that exists only to me,
Only I know it's expression,
To describe it,
Is to disloyal it,
However, you are there,
The only thing any outsider will ever lay eyes upon.
I admit this begrudgingly,
For I wish you were all my own,
As is this place,
Tucked safely away in the folds of my imagination,
Also,
Hindering my self conscious,
Is the sheer fact that this is imagined and only imagined,
I am without you and retreating from my world,
Becomes more difficult with each passing hour.
My Mouth
My Mouth
I've no right to claim you,
....I crave you none the less,
Nor should I need you,
Realistically, I need no one,
Pointless, to think of you as I do,
These thoughts accompanied by confusion without definition,
However, I carry on,
Clearly a dead end awaiting me,
My head in comparison to my heart,
Two polar opposites,
Lost between one point and the other,
My mouth in the middle,
At a loss for words,
Influenced by both,
Fighting to keep my composure.
I've no right to claim you,
....I crave you none the less,
Nor should I need you,
Realistically, I need no one,
Pointless, to think of you as I do,
These thoughts accompanied by confusion without definition,
However, I carry on,
Clearly a dead end awaiting me,
My head in comparison to my heart,
Two polar opposites,
Lost between one point and the other,
My mouth in the middle,
At a loss for words,
Influenced by both,
Fighting to keep my composure.
Your Eyes, Written October 7, 2009
Your Eyes
Shallow breathing,
A thrumming heart,
My life you're thieving,
Was yours from the start,
Clock upon the wall,
Hands twitching,
The motion is small,
My palms are itching,
Quickened thoughts,
Panic stricken,
Blurred ink blots,
the lines, they thicken,
Smeared and streaked,
Across my face,
My emotions have leaked,
Forever out of place,
This faceless crowd,
They'll do nothing for me,
Screaming out loud,
It's your eyes that I see.
Shallow breathing,
A thrumming heart,
My life you're thieving,
Was yours from the start,
Clock upon the wall,
Hands twitching,
The motion is small,
My palms are itching,
Quickened thoughts,
Panic stricken,
Blurred ink blots,
the lines, they thicken,
Smeared and streaked,
Across my face,
My emotions have leaked,
Forever out of place,
This faceless crowd,
They'll do nothing for me,
Screaming out loud,
It's your eyes that I see.
Vocal, Written August 28, 2009
Vocal
Tickling my throat
Expanding my lungs
Focusing straight through
About to burst
Spill my guts
Spill my heart
You'll hear me out
When I scream
Scream at the top of my lungs
Tickling my throat
Expanding my lungs
Focusing straight through
About to burst
Spill my guts
Spill my heart
You'll hear me out
When I scream
Scream at the top of my lungs
At The Edges, Written August 28, 2009
At The Edges
Fringe my edges
Slip under my skin
You're unbearable
An itch I cannot scratch
Go away
I wish for nothing more than your disappearance
Become absent
I beg of you now
Leave me here
Vacate my mind
You are unwanted, unwelcome
Fringe my edges
Slip under my skin
You're unbearable
An itch I cannot scratch
Go away
I wish for nothing more than your disappearance
Become absent
I beg of you now
Leave me here
Vacate my mind
You are unwanted, unwelcome
Rhythm, Written August 27, 2009
Rhythm
This pattern,
A decadent dance,
We fall in step,
A natural rhythm,
Let it consume us,
And we are lost,
Lost to all else,
But one another.
A beautiful oblivion,
We combine,
Making this permanent,
Something safe,
And secure.
Fasten your arms around me,
And dance,
Keep close,
And closer still.
We will never sever,
For we are joined together.
This pattern,
A decadent dance,
We fall in step,
A natural rhythm,
Let it consume us,
And we are lost,
Lost to all else,
But one another.
A beautiful oblivion,
We combine,
Making this permanent,
Something safe,
And secure.
Fasten your arms around me,
And dance,
Keep close,
And closer still.
We will never sever,
For we are joined together.
Without a Seam, Written August 27, 2009
Without a Seam
My heart races,
Your fleeting smile,
Unsteady steps,
Irrevocable words,
We are together,
In body,
And mind.
My pulse quickens,
Your side-splitting eyes,
Render my useless,
Keep me captive,
We are one.
Attempt to split us,
We are without a seam.
My heart races,
Your fleeting smile,
Unsteady steps,
Irrevocable words,
We are together,
In body,
And mind.
My pulse quickens,
Your side-splitting eyes,
Render my useless,
Keep me captive,
We are one.
Attempt to split us,
We are without a seam.
Standing, written August 21, 2009
Standing?
Do we stand?
I do not know where we stand
I do not know where I stand
I know where we once were
But where are we now?
Where do we stand?
If we are even standing at all
I know we fell.
Fell out.
So can we stand again?
Am I up or down?
How do, or should I feel?
How does one get back up
After falling that is...
And if we still stand
Are we standing still?
Not making any progress.
Or are we moving forward?
And if so
Together or separately?
I'm just trying to find my footing
The floor seems to be
Out from underneath me anymore..
And where are you?
Still standing?
Alone?
Or with someone else?
And if so,
Who?
And how do I come to terms with that?
I know I can stand on my own
And up for myself
But am I standing anymore?
I know,
Eventually,
I'll have to get back up.
So when I do
Will you help me?
Do we stand?
I do not know where we stand
I do not know where I stand
I know where we once were
But where are we now?
Where do we stand?
If we are even standing at all
I know we fell.
Fell out.
So can we stand again?
Am I up or down?
How do, or should I feel?
How does one get back up
After falling that is...
And if we still stand
Are we standing still?
Not making any progress.
Or are we moving forward?
And if so
Together or separately?
I'm just trying to find my footing
The floor seems to be
Out from underneath me anymore..
And where are you?
Still standing?
Alone?
Or with someone else?
And if so,
Who?
And how do I come to terms with that?
I know I can stand on my own
And up for myself
But am I standing anymore?
I know,
Eventually,
I'll have to get back up.
So when I do
Will you help me?
This written August 4th, 2009
This
The force of you
unyielding.
I break the surface
of this pressure,
Building
behind my ears,
In my veins.
my sputtering heart,
Thou shall not rest,
or ever think clearly again
For that matter.
I'm blinded,
Surrounded,
sucked in,
And tied tight.
I am but mass.
Pass around me
an unmovable object.
You cannot affect me.
The force of you
unyielding.
I break the surface
of this pressure,
Building
behind my ears,
In my veins.
my sputtering heart,
Thou shall not rest,
or ever think clearly again
For that matter.
I'm blinded,
Surrounded,
sucked in,
And tied tight.
I am but mass.
Pass around me
an unmovable object.
You cannot affect me.
For My First
So I started this blog soley to display my poems that I write. I may throw in a personal experience or two, however, mostly my written work will be posted here! I'm going to start off by putting in some work I've previously written dating back to my high school years... Don't judge. Most of these are written based on my thoughts and feelings at the time. I suppose I'll post them seperately? I'm not sure yet. Here we go!
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