It's Mine
A future to hold in the palm of my hand,
In my palm alone.
Unfortunately for me
This is something I've never known.
Never quite free,
To stumble into uncertainty.
A life I control,
Manipulated by me.
Not a genie to others
Being what they want me to be.
Wishes all around,
But none are my own.
This life for me has never been mine alone.
They are wanting what is best,
And it's what I should want
I guess.
But this aching
Itching
In my chest
Constantly reminds me
My heart will not rest.
The hardest
Most difficult
Is around the bend.
And even though I love them
My life is not theirs
To end.
My poems/writings reflect my feelings and anything that inspires me to write the piece. Sharing them on a widescale is a dream of mine, so this is the first step. Enjoy!
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
The Sea as She, Written August 2, 2010
The Sea as She
The sea will breathe me in,
And she will breathe me out.
Over the past four years
I've had my share of doubt.
She is uncertain,
As is the sea.
When one wonders what lies beneath.
Treading water in her waves
Bur no further than your toes
May you gaze.
What mystery would there be
If she allowed the clarity to see.
the bottoms of her depths
Each wave inhaled as a breath.
I would dive into her sea
Knowing I am unable to breathe.
Trust the depths to crush me,
Until I no longer be.
Now a part of her.
Sinking in the sea.
The sea will breathe me in,
And she will breathe me out.
Over the past four years
I've had my share of doubt.
She is uncertain,
As is the sea.
When one wonders what lies beneath.
Treading water in her waves
Bur no further than your toes
May you gaze.
What mystery would there be
If she allowed the clarity to see.
the bottoms of her depths
Each wave inhaled as a breath.
I would dive into her sea
Knowing I am unable to breathe.
Trust the depths to crush me,
Until I no longer be.
Now a part of her.
Sinking in the sea.
Where He Walks, Written August 2, 2010
Where He Walks
A relaxed and serene ocean view,
Luminescent moon on water
And a path of glass for me to walk.
To think of me,
Almost as majestic as he
Who walks on water.
However uncomparable we may be,
I understand why he walks the sea.
A moonlit path of glass.
A relaxed and serene ocean view,
Luminescent moon on water
And a path of glass for me to walk.
To think of me,
Almost as majestic as he
Who walks on water.
However uncomparable we may be,
I understand why he walks the sea.
A moonlit path of glass.
It's Price, Written May 18, 2010
It's Price
The delicacy of beauty,
Confronts me when I least expect
However, I stay true to my duty,
Always learning to accept.
The ugliness that looms,
Draping over our eyes,
Pouring down in monsoons
From the disheveled gray skies.
The beauty itself so easily caved,
As if knowing what was to come
meant it couldn't be saved.
This inevitable fate
Has cost all hope for this place,
Waltzing around in a zombie like state
Every person I pass is without a face.
No judgement or envy without eyes to see
If this were the case,
All beauty'd be free.
The delicacy of beauty,
Confronts me when I least expect
However, I stay true to my duty,
Always learning to accept.
The ugliness that looms,
Draping over our eyes,
Pouring down in monsoons
From the disheveled gray skies.
The beauty itself so easily caved,
As if knowing what was to come
meant it couldn't be saved.
This inevitable fate
Has cost all hope for this place,
Waltzing around in a zombie like state
Every person I pass is without a face.
No judgement or envy without eyes to see
If this were the case,
All beauty'd be free.
You Aren't Listening, Written April 26, 2010
You Aren't Listening
Hidden as always,
Keep yourself closed off,
At a safe viewing distance,
Barricaded in
Blocked off from all else;
Or just me.
The one you don't want to see
The one you can't see
Or choose not to.
Whichever.
What if,
You take me for what I am
And take what I am trying to show you,
Trying to give you.
Refuse me.
Like you have, and will.
Even if i was within reach
Would you accept me..
Catch me as I'm falling..
You wouldn't before.
You think you know what I need.
What it takes to get me by.
So keep on taking it away from me
Claim that you've nothing more to offer.
You may take things for what they are
As I act foolishly
In the only way I know how.
But I will continue to wear my heart on my sleeve
For all to see,
Especially you.
I wear it for you.
I cannot make you feel
As you have shown me countless times.
You're impossible to reach,
Perched upon your mature feelings.
Your need to handle this with control.
I am reckless
I am immature
And I will flounder on the ground
Until you open up and feel.
Lose yourself in what we have.
I will not pester you
Drown you in my wishes,
What I wish could be,
What I know could be.
If I could travel through time,
Travel through space,
I hope you know where I'd be.
I know you do.
Watch me destroy everyone else for you.
I know I will.
Regardless of my intentions.
Hidden as always,
Keep yourself closed off,
At a safe viewing distance,
Barricaded in
Blocked off from all else;
Or just me.
The one you don't want to see
The one you can't see
Or choose not to.
Whichever.
What if,
You take me for what I am
And take what I am trying to show you,
Trying to give you.
Refuse me.
Like you have, and will.
Even if i was within reach
Would you accept me..
Catch me as I'm falling..
You wouldn't before.
You think you know what I need.
What it takes to get me by.
So keep on taking it away from me
Claim that you've nothing more to offer.
You may take things for what they are
As I act foolishly
In the only way I know how.
But I will continue to wear my heart on my sleeve
For all to see,
Especially you.
I wear it for you.
I cannot make you feel
As you have shown me countless times.
You're impossible to reach,
Perched upon your mature feelings.
Your need to handle this with control.
I am reckless
I am immature
And I will flounder on the ground
Until you open up and feel.
Lose yourself in what we have.
I will not pester you
Drown you in my wishes,
What I wish could be,
What I know could be.
If I could travel through time,
Travel through space,
I hope you know where I'd be.
I know you do.
Watch me destroy everyone else for you.
I know I will.
Regardless of my intentions.
My Mask, Written April 12, 2010
My Mask
The sound,
It triggers my release.
An escape to only where I know myself.
A stranger to all else.
A mansion housing only me,
Overlooking an aggressive sea,
But there is only me.
Feeling depth,
In each dying breath.
Keeping still,
Savoring the last of my tranquil,
Time that has elapsed in space.
the world is gaining,
At an alarming pace.
Soon to be swallowed,
In a world we all know,
A life emptied and hollowed,
Where little will grow.
To keep me here is all I ask.
To blind a hideous world,
With my mask.
The sound,
It triggers my release.
An escape to only where I know myself.
A stranger to all else.
A mansion housing only me,
Overlooking an aggressive sea,
But there is only me.
Feeling depth,
In each dying breath.
Keeping still,
Savoring the last of my tranquil,
Time that has elapsed in space.
the world is gaining,
At an alarming pace.
Soon to be swallowed,
In a world we all know,
A life emptied and hollowed,
Where little will grow.
To keep me here is all I ask.
To blind a hideous world,
With my mask.
Without You, Written March 14, 2010
Without You
Mangled in my own confusion,
Never seeming to sort things out.
Only a repressed regret
Featherless and cast out.
Kept forever at a distance,
The time only trudges by.
Locking my limbs in a frozen state
I've not even the strength to cry.
Powerless and beaten down,
Beneath a blush toned sky.
I refuse to give you up
Even my heart you will deny.
Mangled in my own confusion,
Never seeming to sort things out.
Only a repressed regret
Featherless and cast out.
Kept forever at a distance,
The time only trudges by.
Locking my limbs in a frozen state
I've not even the strength to cry.
Powerless and beaten down,
Beneath a blush toned sky.
I refuse to give you up
Even my heart you will deny.
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